Because

I struggle now what to say, if to say anything at all. Is it trite or tacky to mourn so publicly? On a blog of all places? I don't know. No one sent me a rule book.

I turned to Ashbloem, who managed to do exactly this with such grace and beauty. She is always good with words, so much better than I could ever hope to be. I envy her this.

I know the pang of the loss that I feel this moment is not even a fraction of what Leila's family and her closest friends are going through. I feel I mourn for them, her husband and young son most of all, as much as I mourn for Leila herself.

What happens next? I have no idea. All I know is this: she will be missed.